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How to Create a Birth Plan that Aligns with Your Vision, Values & Goals

If you’re pregnant, want to be pregnant or even thinking about getting pregnant in the future, this post is for you.

Nicole Raymondi, a birth doula and childbirth educator, is here today to teach us how to create a birth plan that aligns with your vision, value and goals.

Creating a birth plan is an individual process and an important one too. It’s specific, personal and should be honored by your birth team.

In this post Nicole is going to walk you through how to create your own, how to be your own advocate and how to pivot and accept that through labor and birth things change, and your plan may need to be adjust accordingly.

With that, let’s welcome Nicole to the blog.

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Hello mama to be (or repeat mama!), I’m Nicole Raymondi, and I’m so happy to be here today, supporting you in creating the birth of your dreams.

Today I’m a proud mama, Birth Doula, and Childbirth Educator. But let’s rewind for a minute. Before birth completely rocked my world and shifted me into supporting women, I spent over a decade deep in the personal growth space—coaching, educating, and teaching people how to master their minds through meditation, mindfulness, hypnotherapy, and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). I called it Mental Fitness because, let’s be honest, the ways in which we understand and use our minds has a profound impact on our bodies, relationships, and overall well-being.

The decade before that, I was sick. Really sick. And after a dozen different medications, several dozen doctors, and dozens more frustrating “we don’t know what’s wrong with you” appointments, I realized I had to change everything to get better. I left New York City for Los Angeles, dove headfirst into the crunchy world of holistic nutrition, mindful movement, alternative medicine, and all the things I was taught were a bunch of woo-woo nonsense in my mainstream, public school, Upstate NY upbringing.

But the real work for me came in learning to turn inward, change my self-talk, and listen to my intuition. I healed myself.

And then, at 36 years young, I got pregnant. It tested everything I had learned in those decades leading up to seeing that little blue line light up positive on that pregnancy test. I set the intention to have the most holistic, empowering birth experience possible. I knew it would be the culmination of all of my work and values. I knew it would change my entire existence.

Like many women, I started with the traditional resources: pregnancy books, far too many black hole scrolls on Instagram, some random YouTube videos, and local childbirth classes. Yet I quickly realized they were all missing something crucial—the recognition that birth isn’t just medical. It’s physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. They taught me about stages of labor and medical interventions but skipped over the incredible power of mindfulness, nutrition, movement, and intuition to shape our birth experience.

So, I did what I’d spent my career teaching others to do: I took control of my experience.

I spent my pregnancy weaving together everything I knew about the mind-body connection with evidence-based birth practices. I transformed fear into confidence, surrender into strength, and uncertainty into unwavering trust in my body’s ability to birth.

That journey led me from planning a hospital birth with an OB to choosing a birth center, and finally, to a peaceful, candlelit home birth with my midwife and husband by my side. It wasn’t pain-free, but it was free of suffering. It wasn’t without challenge, but it was without struggle. It was intense, beautiful, and deeply connected to something far greater than myself.

After that life-changing experience, I knew I had to share what I’d learned. I created Zen Birth to give other women the tools to approach birth with the same sense of empowerment, clarity, and peace. Because birth isn’t just about bringing a baby into the world—it’s about birthing a new version of yourself, one who is strong, deeply in tune with her own intuition, and fiercely aware of her own power.

You deserve to have a birth that aligns with your vision, values, and goals—a birth you look back on with pride, gratitude, and pure wonder for the power of your feminine life-giving body.

Let’s create that birth together.

How to Create a Birth Plan That Aligns with Your Vision, Values, and Goals

If you’re here with me today, it’s because you’re seeking more than just a checklist for your birth plan. There are plenty of those floating around online. That wasn’t it for me either. You’re here because you want to create a birth plan that truly reflects your vision, values, and goals for one of the most transformative experiences of your life. Through my years serving as a birth worker, I’ve learned that the most meaningful birth plans aren’t just lists of preferences—they’re heartfelt reflections of what matters most to you.

Let’s walk through my 3 steps for creating the birth plan – and birth – of your dreams.

Create Your Vision for Birth

Getting really specific on your vision for birth is a powerful, powerful way to create the birth you desire. As in all manifestations, getting really clear aligns your awareness, and more particularly, your Reticular Activation System, in seeking out the people, places, resources, and opportunities that will bring your vision to life. Having your own clarity, also allows you to translate it to others.

I love a quote from Steven Covey’s book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People that says, “All things are created twice. There’s a mental or first creation and a physical or second creation to all things.”

We of course need to be open to the higher plan after we’ve set our plans in place, absolutely. Yet, so many mothers are afraid of, or discouraged, from getting real clarity on the birth that would rock their whole world and leave a memorable mark on the rest of their lives. We’re told:

“Birth never goes to plan, so why bother making one?”

“Having a birth plan just sets you up for disappointment.”

“Mothers with birth plans are just asking for interventions and complications.”

“Trust the professionals; they know what’s best for you and your baby,”

“A healthy baby is all that matters anyway,”

All sorts of disempowering things. We’re left to feel birth plans and preferences are high maintenance, overly optimistic, and overly rigid. Here’s the thing though. On this journey, your birth journey, I want you to be a high-maintenance tell-it-like-it-is badass mama.

Let’s dive into a little exercise to get clear on your vision:

Close Your Eyes and Relax:

Begin by closing your eyes for a moment and taking three slow, deep breaths. In through your nose, and out through your mouth. With each breath, let any tension in your body release. Envision yourself feeling calm, grounded, and fully present.

Visualize Your Ideal Birth:

Now, imagine your birth unfolding exactly as you wish. Ask for what you want here. Make it known to yourself and the universe. Use all five senses to create a vivid picture. Ask yourself:

+ What do you see? Notice the environment, the lighting, and the faces of those around you.

+ What do you hear? Focus on the sounds that reverberate an empowered birth. Maybe it’s the rhythm of your breathing, maybe it’s your husband’s encouraging words in your ear or your doula’s cheerful cries of excitement as she proudly watches your progress, or perhaps it’s your own voice – moaning deep and low moving your baby closer and closer to the moment you hold them in your arms.

+ How do you feel? Do you feel powerful? Calm? Centered? Like a divine birthing goddess? Tune into the primal self that wants to lead. She is your Birth Muse. How does your body feel physically? Maybe you’re uncomfortable but your body is relaxed and tension-free. Maybe you feel a freedom of movement and expression in your body as you intuitively dance with your baby. Maybe you feel pain but can continually translate that pain into purpose.

Write it Down:

Take out your journal and write down what you saw, heard, and felt. Writing your vision down is a powerful way to make it a reality. Describe your ideal birth with as much detail as possible, capturing your emotions, environment, and all five senses. Grab your copy of the Zen Birth Plan and add a sentence that translates your vision for your birth team. Revisit your detailed vision regularly, even if just for five minutes during your morning or evening meditation. Prepare to birth like a goddess.

Discover Your Deepest Values Around Birth:

Next, let’s uncover the core values that will serve as your internal compass for birth. Many of us go into birth unaware of our highest values and, therefore, struggle to make aligned decisions about birth; both when setting our birth preferences and navigating unexpected changes during birth. When you understand your deepest values, you step into birth with a grounded energy and resounding confidence. To find your values:

+ Identify Your Core Values: Reflect on your vision and identify three core values that define it. These could be things like; autonomy, safety, spiritual connection, peace, calmness, freedom, empowerment, etc.

+ Write it Down: Take out your Zen Birth Plan and record your top three values. This will solidify your understanding of them and communicate your priorities to your birth team.

Bonus: Explore Potential Alternatives: If you want to take this a step further; for each core value, think of ways to honor it if circumstances change. Write down each alternative as an empowered choice, rather than a compromise. For example:

+ “If my freedom of movement is restricted, I can stay free in my mind through focused breathing and visualization.”

+ “If more medical support is needed, I will maintain a peaceful environment by requesting soft voices and dim lighting.”

+ “If an epidural is absolutely necessary, I will continue to stay connected with my baby and affirm we are working together in harmony to create the best birth experience possible.”

Great work. Notice how your ideal birth vision and the alternative paths feel aligned with your core values. You’ve maintained the “why” and adjusted the “how”. Through this exercise, you’re actively shaping a clear vision and a mindset of powerful adaptability. Congrats, mama. You’ve just created an extremely strong foundation for your birth experience.

Establish Meaningful Birth goals:

With your vision and values clear, you can set meaningful birth goals—specific intentions that reflect what you want to achieve. These goals act as guiding lights throughout your birth journey.

Consider goals like:

Physical: To labor in positions that feel intuitive and support my body’s natural process.

Emotional: To feel calm, supported, and empowered throughout labor.

Mental: To maintain a positive and resilient mindset throughout labor, using mindfulness, affirmations, and breathwork to stay focused and calm, even when faced with challenges.

Spiritual: To remain present and connected with my baby during birth.

Medical: To avoid unnecessary interventions while staying open to those that align with my values.

Consider these goals as flexible guiding principles, not rigid expectations. They’re touchstones that help you identify the education, tools, and resources you need to create the birth experience you desire. As we know, birth is unpredictable, and while we can absolutely prepare, we can’t control every aspect. Let these goals inspire you, not create pressure.

Lastly, make sure you talk through these goals with your birth team! It’s so helpful for everyone to be aligned and know how best to support you. Write them down in your Zen Birth Plan, and don’t hesitate to share them during your prenatal appointments. It’s all about keeping those lines of communication open and making sure everyone’s on the same wavelength.

Bringing It All Together: Your Birth, Your Way

Ok mama, take a deep breath. You’ve done beautiful work today – dreaming, reflecting, and getting clear on what truly matters to you in birth. This isn’t just about preferences on a piece of paper; it’s about reclaiming your power and stepping into birth with intention, confidence, and inner peace. Every moment you’ve spent clarifying your vision, identifying your values, and setting goals has planted seeds for the empowered birth experience you truly deserve.

Remember, your birth plan isn’t about controlling every detail – it’s about creating a roadmap that honors who you are and how you want to welcome your baby into the world. It’s about reminding yourself, your birth team, and the universe that you are an active participant in this sacred journey. And when the unexpected arises, as it often will, you’ll navigate it with the adaptability you’ve cultivated here today.

So, what’s next? Let’s keep the momentum going! If you haven’t already, download your Zen Birth Plan – it’ll help you turn all those reflections into a clear path you and your birth team can follow. And if you’re ready to go deeper — to really prepare your mind, body, and soul for a powerful birth — the Zen Birth Course is here for you. It’s a comprehensive, holistic guide that weaves together ancient wisdom with modern science. Inside, you’ll find everything from creating your toolbox of comfort measures and understanding the power of your hormones, to tuning into your intuition, advocating for yourself, and working with your baby in labor. It’s everything you need to walk into labor feeling confident, informed, and deeply connected to your inner knowing.

You are capable. You are powerful. You are worthy of a birth that reflects your deepest desires and highest self. Trust in the work you’ve done today. Trust in your body’s wisdom. Trust in your baby. And trust in the beautiful unfolding of your birth story.

You are a force, mama, own it. And birth like the powerhouse you are.

Nicole Raymondi

Birth Doula, Pregnancy & Birth Educator, Founder at Zen Birth

You can connect with me @nicole.raymondi where I share my lens on holistic pregnancy, undisturbed birth, and intuitive motherhood.

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Be sure to follow Nicole on Instagram and check out her website, Zen Birth for plans and courses to guide you in your pregnancy journey.

x, The Skinny Confidential team

+ Lauryn’s top non-toxic pregnancy products.

++ How to create a non-toxic nursery.



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2025-04-06 08:00:00

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