12 Women on Living Alone

“If you’d ask me 10 years ago to imagine myself at this age, I would have told you that I’d have a husband, kids, and a house in the suburbs,” says Catie, 40. “Turns out, I’m so happy living by myself. Many people think of living alone as a stepping stone to something better, but I don’t long for anything else.” Catie’s Manhattan apartment (above) features a gallery wall, favorite books, and flowery wallpaper she didn’t have to convince anyone else would look great. Below, Catie and 11 others share what it’s like to live alone…

Katie’s pattern-filled home

On leaning into your personality:

“Getting to relax peacefully at home with no one around to witness me is a balm to my introvert soul.” — Katie, 34, has lived alone for 13 years, rural California

“Living alone is so much fun! PJs and true crime as soon as I get home from work? Spontaneous sleepover with a guy from Hinge? Knowing exactly what’s in the fridge at all times? Yes. Yes. Yes.” — Natalie, 34, has lived alone for four years, Chicago

“After a devastating marriage and an even more devastating divorce, the process of rebuilding myself from the ground up was so daunting. I didn’t know who I was or how I wanted to live in the world. When do I want to go to bed? Do I love incense? What do I want to watch? A free weekend was terrifying. I got nervous just going to Target by myself. So, living in my own space, decorating, cooking, and learning to be alone was wildly important. It’s the most rigorous way I’ve found to understand what I really want.” — Kaitlin, 44, has lived alone for eight years,

“I love peeling off my clothes on a hot day and walking around the house naked.” — Claire, 25, has lived alone for 1.5 years, Chicago

On inspiration:

Katie’s farmhouse

“I rent a 1870s farmhouse that’s off the grid and two miles from the closest paved road; wild animals come through the yard, day and night. What makes it extra special is that it’s the same home my mom moved into as a young woman before she met my dad, so it feels a bit like continuing a legacy of strong, independent and capable women being ‘raised’ by this house.” — Katie, 34, has lived alone for 13 years, rural California

“I grew up watching ‘The Mary Tyler Moore Show,’ so a woman living on her own has always felt exciting.” — Cheryl, 69, has lived alone for 13 years, Little Compton, Rhode Island

“I think of the Diana Ross song ‘It’s My House’ when I describe solo living.” — Catie, 40, has lived alone for 11 years, Manhattan

On challenges:

“Covering the rent by myself is hard, especially in a big city, so I’m not saving as much as I’d like.” — Catie, 40, has lived alone for 11 years, Manhattan,

“I used to complain that it was tough to cook for one person. These days, I’ve pivoted to saying, ‘I’m good at feeding myself.’ This means making satisfying meals of the most random things that are already in my pantry. There’s no one around to judge!” — Allie, 40, has lived alone for eight years, Mill Valley, California

“I don’t like solo living when I am sick. Being in pain all alone in the middle of the night is the pits.” — Clara, 37, has lived alone for four years, Cornwall, Ontario

Allie and Toby

On staying social:

“Living with a pet feels like having a witness as you go through your life. My dog, Toby, gets me out of the house four times a day, and my favorite thing is hanging out with him on the couch in the evening.” — Allie, 40, has lived alone for eight years, Mill Valley, California

“Living alone actually keeps me very social, since I need to proactively make plans to see people. Once or twice a week I’ll invite friends over for dinner, and at least once a month an out-of-towner will come stay for a weekend. After my last relationship ended, I moved closer to family. Now, my twin sister is right next door and we can wave to each other from our kitchens.” — Clara, 37, has lived alone for four years, Cornwall, Ontario

Clara lives alone…in a house right next to her sister’s

On transitioning from a shared space:

“After getting divorced, I stayed in the house where my ex-husband and I had lived for 12 years, so the transition was bittersweet. To make the house my own, I switched out the art and replaced the bedroom furniture. And I’ve been lucky enough to find a close-knit community of women who make living here wonderful and leaving here unimaginable.” — Cara, 41, has lived alone for two years, Boulder, Colorado

“I’ve lived solo since my husband died in 2008. At first it was hard — the lack of human interaction once I got home from work felt like an enormous, gaping hole in my life. But now I cherish the quiet. I’ve been dating a guy for years, but I don’t want to live with him or anyone else because I love my autonomy.” — Margarita, 57, has lived alone for 16 years, Minneapolis

“The #1 reason I live alone: I will never again come home to find my roommate trimming her boyfriend’s toenails on our living room couch.” — Jan, 45, has lived alone for 23 years, Portland

On design decisions:

Sarah’s living area

“Eight years ago, I bought a fixer-upper apartment. I had to check the ‘single, unmarried’ box many times on paperwork! The renovation was lots of work, but now my apartment is entirely mine, from the paint colors I chose to the antique mirrors I sourced. I designed my home and I design my days — there’s something incredibly powerful about that realization.” — Sarah, 38, has lived alone for eight years, Manhattan

“I just remodeled my bathroom and while I didn’t set out to build a girly pink bathroom, somehow, I ended up with a girly pink bathroom. I absolutely love it.” — Jan, 45, has lived alone for 23 years, Portland

Cheryl at home

On valuable lessons:

“My husband Kenny and I lived together for 30 years, and I’ve lived alone since his death. My home is where we raised our children. But the regular maintenance of a house is never-ending. I liked making those decisions as a team, but I’ve become incredibly confident in managing it on my own. I’ve also found people I trust to do work.” — Cheryl, 69, has lived alone for 13 years, Little Compton, Rhode Island

“Whenever someone asks me, ‘How do you know how to do that?’ I always laugh and say, ‘Who else is going to?’ Recently I had to change out the shower handle, and thanks to the power of Google and trial and error, I did it and felt like a badass.” — Catie, 40, has lived alone for 11 years, Manhattan

“The house I lived in after college was a shoebox-sized cabin in the woods. The first night, a mouse climbed down from the sleeping loft, looked me in the eye, and practically dared me to do something about it. The next day, I stocked up on mouse traps, and I also learned how to sand and refinish floors while living there. 1000/10 would recommend all women live alone at some point in their lives!” — Katie, 34, has lived alone for 13 years, rural California

Do you live alone, or have you in the past? What were the pros/cons?

P.S. 12 readers share their solo travel photos and a vintage lover shares her solo living dream home.

(Photos provided by the interview subjects, except for the portrait of Cheryl, which was taken by Sarah Petrarca.)